Why Jane Bravo?

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One dark and boring night in 2005, sitting alone thinking about life and how weird it is, Sarah Dawood/ Drama wrote her first blogpost as Jane Bravo. What started out as a private ranting space, slowly and gradually evolved into the current blog, which talks about many events, things, and feelings. Just like all of Sarah's other social media platforms, also about many events, things, and feelings --- Instagram: thesarahdawood | snapchat: thesarahdawood | twitter: @SarahDawood | facebook: /groups/TheCoddiwomple

Saturday, December 19, 2015

Remembering Dr. Zafar Altaf

A Leader is not a person, a leader is a Philosophy. Once upon a time in August 1941, in Agar, Uttar Pradesh, India, a boy named Zafar Altaf was born.

I don’t know much about his early life during the Partition and the start of life in Lahore, Pakistan, but I do know he belongs to an extremely respected, close-knit family, with humble beginnings and solid principles. The Altaf blood has a special and rare DNA, and I will tell you more about that another day.
Zafar Altaf, with his right-handed batting style and right-arm leg-spin bowling, made his first-class debut in Lahore in 1958 as a middle-order batsman. He was selected to tour India with the Pakistan Cricket team in 1960; I suppose he was about nineteen at the time.

In 1963, Doctor Sahib received his Master’s Degree in Psychology from the University of Punjab. He continued to play Cricket, and in 1965 he set a fourth-wicket partnership record for Pakistan with Majid Khan. Doctor Sahib went on to serve as Secretary of the Pakistan Cricket Board from 1972 to 1975. 
He then went to the University of Birmingham and completed his PHD in Economics in 1981. In addition to teaching at three known universities in Pakistan, Doctor Sahib served on the National Selection Committee in the 1980s and as Chairman of the Committee for two years, from 1994 to 1996. He also managed the Pakistan Cricket Team during the 1999 World Cup. The sportsmen spirit was close to his heart, he loved the game and he loved the players. So much so that he always wanted to keep them motivated and felt the Government had let the team down and demotivated the team’s spirit for their beloved sport.


He worked extensively as an Economist in the Pakistan Civil Service and kept the position of Federal Secretary for Agriculture, a role he stayed in for a decade starting in the 1990s. He was also Chair at the Pakistan Agriculture Research Council around this time and once again in 2009.
He writes: “Goethe once remarked that culture is developed in solitude and character in the stream of events. Jung would have said that the fusion of opposites (Enantiodromia) will lead to harmonious and useful living.” Dr. Zafar Altaf was an extraordinary character with extraordinary character; he was a culture in himself. I was delighted to read what he wrote in Culture and Character and I love the way he credits his parents here: “In Pakistan we have neither character building nor culture development. It was a habit with me to sit in solitude for one hour after a day’s effort to work out the pros and cons of the day’s work; to see if I had erred in my duty not to the government of the day but to the people of Pakistan. This was ingrained in me by my parents who said that since you have been given authority to serve then make sure that you serve.” The stuff that heroes are made of. 


He goes back to this thought in The Sound Footings of an Economy and asks: “Are we in the service of this country or are we in our own service? There lies the crunch for I can rationalize anything and everything.”
There is no iota of doubt in my mind that he deeply loved his country and countrymen. Often attempting to remind Pakistan of why it was born, where we have tripped and how we continue to stay down. He talks about it in Fantasy Economics – “Pakistan was made from a policy of compassion where all the people living would receive their rightful measure. Ask Hameed Nizami the late founder of Urdu daily Nawa-i-Waqt who formulated the philosophy back in 1940. Is this what we have got into? We should have realized what we did to former East Pakistan but we are very poor at learning from our own history. We can learn from Ata Turk (and so have I been there). His library is one of the finest. The value system that he gave to the people was from his own doings. Do we have that kind of commitment from our own leaders? Our thinking like our other aspects are not deep. We are shallow in thoughts and seldom meet our ever growing needs for deep thinking.” 

I think he believed in doing everything for a good reason, the result of the exercise must somehow have value and enhance an individual. In his article, The Economics of Lying, he writes: "Technology nowadays rides people and that is harmful for it diminishes human judgement and therefore makes the system more selfish and complicated." He uses the example of flashy models creating desires for things that we need for other reasons but do not desire in the manner we are programmed to think: "It is not meant for gallivanting. The desire is controlled by the thinking that is developed by the elders in a family. The nucleus family itself is in turmoil so how can it take care of its off springs." This is all true, we lack caring. He goes on to say, "How is caring managed? One meaning of care is love. This may mean many things to many people but if one is careful and loving to oneself then that becomes in-built in a duty of care to the others you want to hate." Later on he says, "Sometimes hope, excessive hope, is built on lies. The hope is in the future and sometimes this hope is two or three decades away." He ends the discussion with, "There are no hard and fast rules and therefore the thinkers will have to devise new and positive means to perform well." Almost as if he is asking, do you have what it takes? 

With each piece I read, I couldn't help but be reminded of love for my country. It pains me to see the state of things here and where they are headed if we don't change the wrongs. Dr. Zafar Altaf's writings seem to be almost like written messages a concerned father would send to a problematic child in trouble repeatedly, the father constantly trying to offer advice and solutions to set this child towards betterment and a secure and prosperous future. This was his love for Pakistan. He wanted to take us towards betterment and prosperity. In Learning to Fight Gangsters, he writes: "Where Mercedes Benz and BMW travel roads the roads are in pristine condition. Where the poor man's car does a few miles the roads are non-existent." His reflections and predictions speak volumes. "If those that are sitting on high pedestal do not realize they will be brought down. What a fall that will be my countrymen. As it is the north is in a kind of natural disaster and the south some kind of personal disaster. Inequality breeds some kind of criminal activity. Pakistan figures though unreported, still cross the 12000 cases reported for theft and dacoities in a week. Criminals rule this country. And this will continue till the politicians clean up their act. We are so good at telling others what to do that it is now an embarrassment." This statement reminds me of what he wrote in Culture and Character: " Culture and character and any other manifestation that we have do not fo together in a country. In fact what do go together is not law and order but police and disorder." Because... as he says, "The culture and the fashion of culture is developed by written not by the verbal word." 


"Lessons of history are never learnt by supercilious idiots. They only abuse these lessons." He constantly tried to make us think. "Does the truth pay? That was the question that one faced in an introspective manner. Is it worthwhile to have trust on one's side? As I look back I find that the character that is built in the personality is not only a function of education but also a function of censorship which comes from multiple sources. However, the system that Pakistan seems to be building on is about short-term cleverness never mind what happens later. The social systems have collapsed thanks to the media exposing the doings and undoings of the powerful. The unknowns of previous times have become the knowns of the present." - from The Sound Footings of an Economy

In Fantasy Economics he starts, "In life one is always concerned with the poor and their welfare. Pakistan is no different but there have always been statements to this effect by politicians. Yet the facts are different. If one were to go by the asset declarations given by the politicians then the evidence is that the powerful people have used this country for their own ends." He made me laugh (and cry) at how cheeky yet powerful the message is, "I suggest that the politicians live in a village and share the bedroom with the buffaloes. The indigenous Eau de Cologne will last for at least a week. In fact it will be a great experience if the entire NA were to go and have a month long session over there. I am sure that the hospitality of the villagers will be overwhelming. The other advantage will be that these members of the NA will come to terms with reality." Clearly he loved Pakistan, he loved the citizens, the common man, and understood the suffering of the citizens at the hands of the politicians and Government. This is evident in Economic Delusions of grandeur - "The Mina Tragedy people will be given five lakhs for the death of the dear ones while injured get two lakhs. How insulting a behaviour is this? When will we learn about human dignity? Or are we born in a dead state?"


Dr. Zafar Altaf was no ordinary human being. We have lost a treasure, a scholar, a mentor, thinker, father of the countrymen, a gentleman... we have lost a legend. I pray and excessively hope his principles, his value system, and his philosophies have transfused into some of the current generation, because we will need all these to change the sad condition of Pakistan. 

I am sad for Pakistan's loss as we say goodbye to Dr. Zafar Altaf. But I am personally also deeply sad that I never had the good fortune of meeting this great man during his lifetime. I can't begin to imagine the impact his spoken words would have and how he could inspire in person a thousand times more than his written words have moved me. But then I comfort myself as I remember what he wrote, "The culture and the fashion of culture is developed by written not by the verbal word."  


May he rest in peace, amen.

Sunday, November 29, 2015

Home Is Where You Have Pretty Things - #MyLifewares

It was a pleasure to be invited by TDF to the #MyLifewares launch at Dolmen Mall Clifton, Karachi, by Interwood. Mall events need great attention to detail, and this one was so tastefully put together, I literally wanted to revamp my entire home with everything I saw at the Interwood displays around the mall and in the store!  Not to mention the extremely cool "Be Our Next Model" competition; I ended up getting my picture taken and receiving a nice framed piece in 30 minutes!

Interwood Store at Dolmen Mall Clifton, Karachi

If you're looking for exquisite, quality pieces on a budget, Interwood is the place to check out for sure. You have to go see this store... it is designed beautifully and in a way that you can keep walking around and see different things on each round. As Brand Manager of Lifewares, Amna Umair, says: “The idea of ‘Lifewares by Interwood’ is to not only sell a product to our customers but a whole experience..." - I easily spent a good hour or two looking at the furniture, lighting and decor ideas. Not to mention, set beautifully: the store is a clever masterpiece, because no matter where you look, you'll connect to something that is your idea of comfort and "pretty things" - immediately making you imagine your ideal home space as you walk around.


All good lounges come to those who go to Interwood

Bottle-green Jade Lamp
I picked five favourite items, which you can see on my Instagram with the hashtag #SarahsDreamHome, these were (in random order):

1. The Jade bed set - a delightful combination of a bed, side table, magical bottle-green glass lamps, cushions and throws.

2. A three-seater recliner - such a comfy looking thing. Perfect to just drop down on after a long day at work and put your feet up. Good for snuggling and snacks while watching TV too.

3. A dresser - so classy, yet so simple. A piece every women must have for her morning rituals of getting ready to face the world.

4. A sofa - a deliciously rich chocolate brown leather sofa, can seat about four skinny people and three not-so-skinny ones. Easy to clean and just perfect for a casual or formal setting.

5. The L-shaped five-seater set - elegant and chic, this one piece is enough for a small lounge or meeting room.

Kitchen Ideas
A Purple Corner
Presently, Lifewares by Interwood is offering a 10% discount (a limited time offer) on all products available at their outlet in Dolmen Mall, Clifton.
I do recommend you check it out now! 

There are some great deals for wedding shoppers, and something for everyone, whether you are looking for gifts or revamping your rooms, there are keepsakes, paintings and flower arrangements too. Bedroom, a children's room, a study, a kitchen or a dining area, you name it... Interwood has it all, not to forget even prettier frills like shiny lamps and funky wall clocks, so much to cheer up any dull old walls and corners. 
Dining Tables and everything else that goes with it



Home is where you have pretty things - go get some!

Saturday, November 14, 2015

First Depressions

"You can't be a damsel in distress when it suits you!" he screams at her.

She sits there in her sweat pants and hoodie, hair in a tight ponytail which adds to the throbbing pain inside her skull. She isn't being a damsel. But she is deeply in distress. She needs help. Wants help. She is asking for help. He isn't a bad guy. But he can't see it, hear it, or understand it. She just needs someone to hold her hand while she saves herself. She had done it all before, dug herself out of a seemingly bottomless pit, but this time she is exhausted and needs help digging. Maybe she just wants him to pull her out. Maybe she is just tired of being strong. Maybe she is thinking about giving up.



John Newman - Love Me Again [Official Video] HD by funjakob

Depression is a terrible thing. People who suffer from depression can't sleep it off, or eat chocolate and be OK... basically, there is no way for them to avoid it.

Try to remember that when you are losing your patience with someone who is struggling with crippling depression. Don't be frustrated with them. Try to care for them, try to show them you care. They can't stop what they are feeling, and they can't explain it properly either.

When you tell someone suffering from depression to just "Get over it!" it's like telling someone with Cancer to "Get over it!" or telling a man with a broken leg to walk and run and dance, because the pain is just in their mind. But you would never do that, because you can see the Cancer test reports, you can see the broken leg. In the case of depression, you can't see what is affected, which parts are broken, or how deep the pain is. So when someone you know is struggling with depression - please be there for them and give them time to overcome the pain, heal, get strong again.

Most depressed people just need to vent what they are feeling. It is very hard for them to express what they are feeling or why they are feeling it. Try to talk to them. They are not playing games to get your attention. They are very scared. They may be on the precipice of suicide or self destruction. Not because they don't want to live anymore. But because they don't want to live with this "feeling" anymore. Listen carefully to anything they are trying to tell you, without judgement. They are very damaged inside. They are genuinely hurting like the guy with a broken leg before he gets the painkillers and the cast. Save them from the feeling of hopelessness.

If you see signs of suicidal tendencies, take them to get treatment.

Depression is a terrible place to be. People suffering from it eventually isolate themselves from others, because they are tired of hearing "Stop doing this to yourself!". They won't change, but they will stop "bothering" you if that is the only response you give them. Some people with depression are mentally very strong - this is the worst. They will seem calm and continue to do things which are routine, because routine things don't require much thought or planning. To you they will appear totally normal, living their life as if the crying fit from a month back was just hormones or something. These people are the ones you need to really worry about... this is even more dangerous than the regular depressed person... because on the surface you will see no signs of depression. But if you look closely, you will see they have isolated themselves from every possible situation outside of routine.

If you love someone struggling with depression please help them overcome it.

~ JB

Friday, October 09, 2015

Make the #First1000Days Healthy.

As it happens, I wasn't able to attend Nestlé's ‘Start Healthy, Stay Healthy’ event... recently organized to raise awareness about the importance of nutrition in the first 1000 days of a child’s life. Dr. Huma Fahim (a Medical Advisor at Nestlé) gave an informative presentation, which I read about and heard great things about, and the whole time all I could think about was the magic that my mother's homemade handmade butter had brought to my life, my mind, and my body overall... 

Going back to the early 80s, homemade butter was a part of life for my brothers and me. I am quite proud to say there are few people my age today who can claim they were brought up on mom's homemade anything. Mothers today don't really understand the value of nutrition, nor the concept of "healthy". I salute my mother, who was a full-time mom and school teacher till we got well into our teens. How she had time to make homemade butter, I will never know! 

As an child, a teen, and an adult I have always felt stronger mentally and physically compared to my peers. I strongly believe this is because of my mother's need to make sure we "start healthy", and I wish more parents would give their children a solid and healthy foundation to grow on. 

Scientists and Doctors change many statements annually... but one thing remains consistent: the effects and importance of the exposure we get and environment we experience from the time we are embryos to the time we start walking and talking, till about age two. The initial two years are the most scientifically amazing period for growth and development of a human being. Most of the brain develops by this time, which basically means, the blueprints for how we will grow ahead mentally and physically are written and locked by this time. 

As mothers, as bajis, phupos, and women, we must understand this idea and share it with other women and mothers. We need to understand that we owe this to our future generations - to give them a chance at being stronger, better, quicker. So tell your friends, and tell your maids about the importance of nutrition for their young kids. And the importance of nutrition for themselves when they are expecting a child. Do your part, remember the #First1000Days and ‘Start Healthy, Stay Healthy’.

Friday, March 13, 2015

"Accept It"

Tough times don't last, tough people do... When the going gets tough, the tough get going... When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile... Tough people are not born, they are made when no one is there to wipe away their tears... You were given this life because you are strong enough to live it... When everything feels like an uphill struggle just think of the view from the top... Don't be afraid of tough times because it gets you real friends and real friends get you through tough times... Hardships often prepare ordinary people for extraordinary things.
Learn that life is tough, but you are tougher.


On most days I am a strong believer of all of the above.

The list of this bite-size motivation is endless... Feeling down? Google to the rescue! I know, because I try to keep myself uplifted with these little numbers whenever I'm down or feeling helpless or having a bad day or feeling ill. But I'm noticing that it is getting harder and harder to believe all this motivational crap, and I think it might not be completely true... because I'm only human. I'm not Thor, or The Hulk, or Yoda. So, these days, instead of looking for motivation on Google... I'm trying this new thing called "Accept It". 


I remember recently when a car came out of nowhere and hit me on a Monday morning on a quite road in a residential area... I was shaking and petrified, and the first thing that came out of my mouth to the aged driver who had hit me (literally) in more ways than one..."I have five thousand problems and you've just added one more!" 


A little while later, as a dear friend tried to comfort me with an Espresso shot, fine chocolates, and a pep talk about how strong I am and how I've gotten through much bigger ordeals in my life... I continued to weep like an annoying, spoiled, stubborn child and blubbered, "When ten really bad things happen to you, and you cope with them, and deal with difficult things over and over again, by then you've had to get up ten times, and you've tried to stay brave and optimistic throughout... and then an eleventh thing happens and you just don't have any energy left to get up that eleventh time." Not important to mention... but this was all figurative speech. It was not the eleventh time... it was the twentieth... but then, my Math skills are quite questionable.


So anyway, these days I'm trying this new thing called "Accept It". And the real truth is:

Tough times don't last forever; and contrary to common belief, neither do tough people. 
We're only human.
- Jane Bravo

Sunday, March 08, 2015

IWD 2015

Like many things we blindly celebrate in Pakistan... we celebrate Women's Day too. And by celebrate, I mean we create advertising around it to make brands seem global and futuristic, we do talk shows with celebrities and give out gift hampers at lunches, and go about our lives as if all is great and we have done our part in celebrating The Women. When the sad reality is that women are rarely genuinely celebrated in Pakistan. I think we need more than just a day to celebrate Women in Pakistan. I think it should be 365 days a year that we salute the female for the contribution she makes to out nation and our country on an on-going daily basis since the independence of Pakistan.

On 8th March 2015 I started the day with my maid Naseem, coming over on the dot at 8am. She's a small woman, hardly 30, she has five kids all aged under 10. Her husband doesn't work. He doesn't beat her. But he is into gambling and I think he is an addict too. She speaks of him like he is an amazing husband, and I try not to talk her out of it. Naseem didn't know it's women's day. No one celebrated her life.

And really it isn't about celebrating anything... it is about paying tribute, it is about recognizing that the weaker sex needs to be loved, and respected and cared for... and protected. I wish we learn to love not only our own wives, daughters, sisters, mothers, but that we learn to love all women and understand that they make the world a nice place. From the time we are born, women nurture us - our mothers and grandmothers, and sisters, and phupos, and khalas and our friends mothers and the teachers in school... these are the people who shape our futures. Let's give them the love they deserve.

I want to live in a world that loves women unconditionally, every day.
Be that world every day, not just on 8th March.

- JB


Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Nutella.

I find it surreal that Michele Ferrero died on 14 February... a day when people around the world bought, ate, gave, received and enjoyed chocolates.

Along with Ferrero Rocher, Kinder, and some other sweet things... Michele Ferrero also gave the world Nutella. My personal favourite. 



The humble beginnings of Nutella was a product called Supercrema... which was revamped in name and composition to give the inhabitants of the world their first jar of Nutella in 1964. Needless to say, this little tweaking to a meager spread was like hitting a chocolate nail on a hazelnut head - Nutella became an instant success and continues to please people till today.

I remember when my dad got me my first jar of Nutella... I was about 12, it was love at first spread.
Some days all one needs is two-tablespoons of Nutella to make things sweeter, nicer, better... that's roughly 200 calories of things that you aren't supposed to consume when you're on diets, namely sugar and fat. 

Dammit. I love you, Nutella. 

Rest in peace, Mr. Ferrero. You made a lot of girls smile!

~JaneBravo